The Rough Side of Re-entry

Vaccinations are happening. We are slowly starting to leave the house, go places, see people, do things. This is such a relief for so many people: those who haven’t been able to work, those who are lonely, those who are bored, extroverts. These folks are sprinting toward re-entry with grins on their faces and wide-open arms. Others of us are cautiously sauntering at best. We expect re-entry to be at least a little rough.

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What’s All the Hullaballoo about Boundaries?

I’ve been thinking about boundaries lately. We all know it’s important to have good boundaries, but we’re not always clear why it’s important or what having good boundaries means exactly. A boundary is a marker that says, “This is where I end and you begin. Between me and that marker is my psychological space. I have full domain over that space. I get to say what is important to me, what is true for me, what my needs and wants are, what my feelings are, and what my pain points are. I get to say what my beliefs and opinions

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Alternatives to Dieting

Wanna guess what my opinion of dieting is? Yep, exactly. It is all kinds of hope wrapped up in a shiny package that wears off after days or weeks or months and almost always leaves you feeling worse than when you started. Most people who go on a diet and lose weight will gain it all back in 1-5 years. Not only that, most people gain back more than they lost. When I say “most people,” I do mean most. 95% of diets fail. Those are not good odds. Those are not even just bad odds. Those are HORRIBLE odds.

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How To Practice Body Neutrality

I’ve written a couple of articles about what body neutrality is and why our society desperately needs it as an alternative to body negativity and body positivity. I hadn’t yet written about how to do it in real life. This is the How To for body neutrality. As a reminder, body neutrality is an approach we can take toward our bodies that focuses on how they function instead of how they look. When we focus on how our bodies are functioning, we are reminding ourselves that how they look doesn’t have to matter.* We are reminding ourselves that the value

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Pay Attention! (To get more of what you want)

What most of us want to know is: How do I get more of what I want and less of what I don’t want? Good question. Ready? Here comes the answer: It’s all about attention and where you put yours. If you want more of the good stuff, you have to pay attention. The stuff we want doesn’t often come up and slap us in the face. We have to actively seek it. To do this, we have to be aware of what we want, and then we have to look for opportunities to get it. That all requires paying

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A Path to Body Neutrality

It is freaking hard to like our bodies. We see so many images of people with “beautiful” bodies and body parts. We see so many advertisements for how to change our body to look more like their bodies. Our mothers and friends, who look like us, say mean things about their bodies. We are told, directly and indirectly, that our bodies are not acceptable, sexy, or loveable as they are. And we believe it. It’s hard not to, with the onslaught of Body Negativity that bombards us on an hourly basis from peers and media. Body Negativity teaches us that

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Getting Comfortable with Discomfort

 “Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.” -Flip Rodriguez, American Ninja Warrior Somehow, we have gotten a very dangerous idea in our heads. We, as a society, believe that discomfort and pain are a problem. We see them as an indication that there has been a mistake, that something must have gone wrong. Possibly that we are “wrong.” The aftermath of this kind of thinking is more discomfort and pain. We all know, theoretically, that life has its ups and downs. We all know that life can’t always be smooth sailing, can’t always be butterflies and rainbows. You know that, right? Of

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The COVID Rollercoaster

When I first got on this ride, I had no idea how long it would last or how many twists and turns there would be. I am so glad that I was clueless. If someone had told me in March that my kids would not return to in-person school for over a year, I very well might have spontaneously combusted. I am not a roll-with-the-punches kind of gal. It was helpful that they first said it would be two weeks before the kids returned to school (I laugh now at how unmanageable that felt). Then it was a month, then

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The COVID Marathon

It’s the beginning of Week 5 for most of us.* Most of us started hitting our wall last week. I heard it from patient after patient last week, and still into this week: It is feeling so much harder. Here’s how it’s gone so far: Week 1: Lots of confusion about the virus; concern for what is happening and what may happen; lots of pictures of new “home offices” and cute “office mates” (i.e., pets and kids) on social media; and countless memes about social distancing. Weeks 2-3: Increased confusion; increased concern for our own health, for the health of

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